What educational model is preferable to apply to children? Between severity and permissiveness there is a middle ground on which positive discipline is based and which is gaining more followers every day. It is an approach to education based on affection and firmness but always taking into account respect for the child.
Positive discipline sets rules and limits for the child but always counting on their participation, promoting their autonomy and eliminating traditional punishments.
Specialists in this model of education say that when children are taken into account to set limits, they are more willing and collaborative. They clarify that there are rules in which the child should not interfere, such as their survival, and that the parents will always have the last word.
On our site we give you some examples on how to apply the positive discipline to set limits and norms and enforce them through communication and dialogue.
1 - Empathy: When you put yourself in the shoes of your child, it will be easier for you to listen to him. You must teach your child to negotiate, for example: "You have 2 hours of park if you do your homework." Your child can also participate, through negotiation: "but can you give me a half hour to rest after coming home from school and then I do my homework?" And so their participation is taking place.
2 – Help him think: "Why do you think this is bad for you?" And the same child can elaborate an answer.
3 - Give the example: Children always pay attention to the behavior of their parents. You can say out loud: "I'll rest for half an hour before working on the computer." When they are fulfilled you must stop and announce it, that he realizes that you fulfill your commitments.
4 - Firmness when setting limits: Make him feel important but remembering the rules "do you remember how long we agreed that you would rest?"
5 - Talk to your child: If the child did not follow the rule set to correct a bad action, they are asked: "Do you remember our agreement? What did it consist of? What happened to what we agreed on? What are you going to do to remedy it?" Always make your child feel like he should take charge of his behavior. This way you will be giving him responsibility for his actions.
6 - Criticize the action and not him: Do not generalize to their behaviors: "you are very rude, you are rude, you are a bad child,". Phrases of that type will only become what you say and that they identify with these words. It alludes to action: "You were rude to that person, she would feel better if you apologize to her."
7 - Focus on the positive in your child: It also recognizes the action and not the person. "You did your homework very well, I congratulate you." Avoid phrases like: "you are a good girl, you are the best", etc. You will only get confusing labels because children's actions are not consistently good or bad and it is important that you remember the exact moment you did it right and when you did it wrong.
According to positive discipline Conventional punishments are not good in the long term because they generate resentment and rebellion since they fail to connect the needs of parents and children, their needs are not given importance and finally they do not fulfill the objective of teaching them values for life.
So if you want to be heard, listen, if you want kindness, be kind, if you want respect, respect, and if you want a peaceful home, be more positive when it comes to parenting.
You can read more articles similar to 7 ideas to educate children with positive discipline, in the category of Conduct on site.