Affectivity is the need that human beings have to establish links with other people. Developing a positive affectivity in children will help them to strengthen their self-esteem, to enjoy an adequate emotional balance, to have greater security and to feel protected by their parents.
Not all adults show affection in the same way. There are adults who show more affection than others, and there are even people who are not loving and shy away from any affective contact with the people around them. Well, just like adults, Not all children are equally affectionate and each child expresses his affection for others in different ways.
Dads and moms often complain that their children are rude or unloving, but are those moms and dads loving to their children?
If parents are not affectionate because they have difficulty expressing affection towards their child (hugs, kisses, gestures and words of affection, etc.), it is most likely that the child does not show affection towards their parents. Affection is reciprocal, so if we want our children to be affectionate with us, it is necessary that we be affectionate with them.
It is important that parents show signs of affection and love towards their children to help the little ones to develop a healthy affective world, since it is essential if we want them to be happy people and have the facility to relate to the people around them.
The child's personality is made up of temperament and character. Temperament is inherited and character is the result of the experiences and learnings that the child has!
Temperament is partly responsible for the differences observed in children's behaviors related to emotionality and excitability. Therefore, not all children when they are born behave in the same way.
However, character is the result of the influence of education and the social context in which the child grows and develops. Therefore, we can affirm that the character is made, that is, the child acquires certain behaviors based on what he observes in his closest environment (at home). If a child receives affection and affection from birth, he learns these behaviors and internalizes them.
Various studies have affirmed that what the child learns from birth (character) is more important and has more influence than what he inherits (temperament). Therefore, we must strive as parents to provide children with love and affection so that they can develop adequate affection.
Do not! We must take care of offering love and affection to our child and little by little the child will learn what is the importance of affection, and how he should relate to others. The important thing is that parents do their bit and work together so that the child is a personable and affectionate person.
Sometimes what happens is that parents have expectations about how the child should behave that do not correspond to reality. Children are not always as affectionate towards us as we would like, nothing happens, we must learn to respect their way of relating and simply take care of providing them with a lot of love and affection.
On the other hand, there are times when children realize that displays of affection are very important to their parents and that their parents get upset when they do not show affection towards them. So they use the absence of affectionate behaviors to tyrannize their parents and thus guarantee their attention.
In conclusion, we should not worry if our children have surly or unloving behaviorss, however, we must take care to give them all our affection and affection. Each child learns and evolves at a different rate. We should not worry, if we are affectionate with our child, the child will learn and internalize these behaviors, and later will use them with the people around him.
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