I know that the Estivill method is in question; that there are many who lavish its contraindications and that few are those who have tried it and have managed to follow it to the letter; the truth is that I have to say, that Despite all the criticism, it was great for me.
To put you in the background; The Estivill Method is based on a book that under the title "Sleep child", Dr. Estivill, a neurologist expert in sleep, teaches children from 7 months of life, to calm down when they wake up at night and to fall asleep in his crib without needing to be cradled in his arms.
The method is based on a behavior in which the baby is allowed to cry in his crib at intervals between 1 minute at the beginning, and 5 minutes, at the most. To calm him down, parents must enter the room and talk to him but without holding him, even if the baby cries, sniffs, coughs, kicks and uses all his sweet little angel face to soften our hearts.
It is natural that many find it a method devoid of feeling, hard to implement, both for parents and for the baby, and difficult to maintain over time. Most parents find it difficult to let the child cry uncontrollably in the crib and we are eager to hold him in our arms to give him all our love; Nor is it natural for a baby to cry bitterly and stretch out his arms so that we can hold him and we stay away from him; but I have to admit that we, in a moment of desperation, put it into practice and it was the best we could do.
In my case, I have twins, and despite the fact that we try to unify schedules, each body is a world and they did not always wake up at the same time, but between one and the other it was impossible to sleep an hour at a time. It made us desperate and that made us lose patience many times, we yelled at our daughters and sometimes we let them cry in the crib because of the impossibility of being able to take them both at the same time when one was alone. The trigger for using the Estivill method was one night when I was alone and one of the twins started crying, I took her and, while I calmed her down, the other one started crying; she was crying for more than half an hour without being able to catch her, and the next day she woke up hoarse. The feeling of guilt was so great that I had to take action, and I jumped into the library in search of some solution; then I found the book "Sleep child."
I spoke to my husband and we decided that we would try this method without hesitation and without regret. The first day was hard, but not as hard as I thought, many other nights the girls had cried much longer waiting for her to calm their sister. They were not unattended at any time, but the longest they were alone was 5 minutes, and to our surprise, within an hour they were both asleep. The next two days they hardly cried and the third day they fell asleep as soon as we put them to bed.
Of course, they would wake up from time to time, but they would quickly fall asleep again when they noticed we were close. They learned that they were not alone, but when they cried we soon came, even if we didn't catch them, we were always by their side.
There may be plenty of reasons not to put it into practice: it is unnatural, it can create a lack of self-esteem in the baby, you expose the child to great stress, it can cause anxiety, and attachment disorders. But, The truth is that when lack of sleep and fatigue, especially in the case of multiple births, causes parents to lose patience, and sometimes even sanity, it is a method to take into account.
Honestly, for us it was a tremendous break. We were calmer and more rested in the mornings and that helped us face the day with more strength, energy and above all patience; on the other hand, we have not noticed any of the harmful effects claimed by the detractors of this method. They are two happy and loving girls who feel very close to us.
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