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Review "How to tell children to listen to us ..."


"How to talk so that children listen to us ... How to listen so that children talk to us" is a little marketing title. Too long, hard to remember, seemingly hard hit. It's easy to make mistakes trying to get the sound out of your memory. You must save it and remember to take the card to the bookstore. Even with such preparation, the book will probably not be available on the spot. The inconspicuous cover is lost in the "crowd" of other "parent textbooks".
On the dust jacket, the "two dialog clouds" referring to the main idea of ​​this publication - "conversations" - are not particularly eye-catching. It is easier than grabbing this book with another screaming, expressive color proposition with two, at most three-part titles.

Despite the abovementioned adversities, insights shared by hundreds and even millions of people around the world, the considerations of Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish have become - it's not an exaggeration, what I write now - world best seller. Quite right! In this case, which is not so obvious and common, the number of copies sold is directly proportional to the value of this publication.

To encourage you to read "How to speak ...", you could create a banal text in the style: Are you a parent Do you want your child to always answer the casual "good" when asked "how is school?" You have no choice, this publication is for you!

And what may surprise the enthusiasm and certainty arising from the above statement would be fully justified and quite justified. The book has so many advantages that it is difficult to count them all, listing them in one place so as not to be accused of exaggeration.

First: numerous examples. This is not a dry theory, after which you read, you want to reach for the phone and dial the number to the author of the book, with the question "okay wise ... but how to use this valuable advice in everyday life "He ??". The authors explain clearly and show how to deal with specific situations. They refer not only to their own experience but also to their parents' (on the market you can buy 'How to Speak' with an 'insert' containing advice from Polish parents). In addition to explaining how to act in specific situations, certain behaviors allow you to practice "dry" by leaving room for writing down your thoughts on special pages in the book.

"How to speak ..." are six important chapters full of valuable advice.

The first explains how to help children cope with their feelings. Here the authors realize why it is so important for a child from an early age, and with him that a parent would be able to accept their feelings, be able to name them and deal with it.

The second chapter deals with the topic encouraging children to cooperate, i.e. ways to reduce parental frustration caused by the tedious teaching of children what to do and what is generally unacceptable. Instead of threatening with punishment, forcing the child to complain about it, the authors recommend to describe or present the problem so as to solve the problem itself and not to hurt the child. They point out that instead of long arguments, try to convey your requests and recommendations as much as possible just one word. They notice that it sometimes works to talk about your feelings, or writing a note, as a rule - the written word has more power, and children love to receive letters from parents.

The next chapter explains what methods used instead of punishment, in line with the common trend today, that imposing penalties is not only an ineffective method, but also obsolete. Then the authors share tried and tested ways to encouraging children to independence, explain how to praise that praise be adequate to the situation and well received by the child. Finally, they give some prescriptions on how to free children from playing roles, i.e. situations in which, as a result of certain frequently repeated judgments and emerging situations, the child begins to adopt a certain attitude.

Briefly: "How to tell children to listen to us. How to listen so that children talk to us ”is help that every parent should have at their fingertips to be able to reach for them whenever they are needed.